Sunday, October 14, 2007
Part three: Let it be = Love3
4: I’ve heard a tape of Heather Paulson speaking at a Homeschool convention; her talk was better than the book. She basically gave practical advice on controlling your thoughts and keeping yourself in check but she made at least one odd statement. That your level of devotion is like a post-it note; if you keep using it, then the “glue” will get worn out and you won’t be as devoted to your mate as you could have been. At first hearing, this seems logical, but think again, and apply it in a life situation. Take a nurse for instance, one that loves her job and wishes to do as well as possible; if she has three patients on her rounds, will they not all receive the same level of care and devotion? How about a mother with six children? Will she not devote herself to all six equally? Or will her level of devotion have gone drastically down by the time the sixth arrives? What about you? Say you have three friends and you like them all equally, but for different reasons. If you go to a hockey game with one, a flower show with the other, and then swimming with the third; will your devotion be gone by the time you get to the third? Sure, I understand that the idea is not to devote yourself romantically to someone that you’re not married too. Why not just say that and leave the brainwashing logic out of it? Brainwashing is basically presenting a load of clap-trap with a few facts and fancy sounding names thrown in; it sounds pretty but won’t hold up in the wash. That’s why I’m very leery about people that write in a flowery, exaggerated way; you must read it over several times to gather any meaning and I always wonder, “What are they trying to hide?” I believe that both young men and women should keep their hearts for their future wife/husband but in a practical sense. You don’t have to agonize over it nor do you have to ignore every member of the opposite sex. A young person should not be made to feel guilty for having a harmless crush on someone else, as long as you don’t act on it and behave yourself, they are perfectly normal between the ages of 9-15. What kind of people read Emotional Purity? There are those like me; that can see what is practical and what is not, but then there are the slightly naïve boys and girls and even adults that take every word as if it were Holy Writ. The young people have no experience in romantic relationships and don’t stop to think before they over-examine their own relationships. This can ruin perfectly normal friendships, between boys and girls, between cousins, and it can strain old ties. “It’s silly, but they live by it. And I lived by it, too, once. ‘Till I saw what a toll it took on the people who I love most.”1 They should not be living by someone else’s personal philosophy! These books are suggestions! The only book to live by is the Bible, no self-help books can ever measure up to God’s word and common sense and instinct. Basically everyone teaching these “rules” has made a mistake somewhere and wants to keep others from making one like theirs. That’s admirable, as long as it makes sense and holds up to biblical standards. Still, be wary and check it out thoroughly before you buy it. If a person can write a book and get someone like Elizabeth Elliott or Doug Phillips to laud it, then they have a sure ticket of making a bunch of money. From people like you and I. That gives you pause doesn’t it? With all the “Christian” self-help/instructional books out there, it makes you wonder how many authors simply write fluff to make money. It’s really not that different from the “Christian” record labels, putting out low-talent young artists just to make a buck. “Just remember the words of P.T. Barnum, ‘There’s a sucker born every minute.’ ”2 He was and is correct but I’d rather not be the easy target. How about you?